some thoughts on Mother's Day

I still remember when I was a twenty-something, a woman was telling my mom how she hated Mother's Day.  I was shocked.  How was that possible?  It was like a child saying he hated Christmas.  Unfathomable.

But then I quickly understood.  There are women who have lost a child or their mother, there are women who are single and yearn for a marriage and children, there are women who are struggling with infertility.  And then there are mothers whose child/children have taken a different path than the one they hoped for and there are feelings of sadness, or mothers who simply think they don't measure up / aren't perfect / feel guilty for real / imagined reasons.

Myself?  While I didn't get married until age 42 and wasn't sure even then that motherhood would be in the picture, I felt at peace.  Or maybe it wasn't exactly "peace", but I had accepted my situation and wasn't unhappy or bitter about it.  And my own mother?  Well, let me just say, I am blessed.  And now I have this Curious George-like monkey-boy of a son in my life.  And I don't know that I could feel anything but gratitude and love for this little one.  I could go on and on about how much I love being a mother and how much I love my mother. 

But today, my thoughts are with those women (and even men) who feel sadness on this day.  I know there are those who feel a profound emptiness because they are either single or haven't been able to have children.  I know there are those who have lost their mother - especially those like my own dear husband who lost his mother earlier in life.  I know there are mothers who worry night and day about the choices their children make (including my own mother worrying about me and my siblings).  I know there are mothers (me) who feel guilty for the little things you do and shouldn't or don't do and should.

So to those women, I'm not going to tell you platitudes such as "if it's meant to be, it will be" because I HATED it when people told me that.  I'm not going to tel you (even though I actually do believe this) that we are all mothers to all the children (and even some of the adults!) in our lives. 

I AM going to tell you that my thoughts are with you.  That I am sorry for the sadness, the loneliness, the pain and the sorrow this day brings.  And more than anything, that I sincerely do believe that you and I have a Heavenly Father who knows your sorrow and your sadness and your pain. And most of all that He loves you, He knows YOU and He is there for you.