I survived...sorta

The past two weeks have been, well, thoroughly exhausting. Physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually and any other way possible that I'm not thinking of right now. And unfortunately, it's not over.


Another High Point Market has come and gone. I thought things would calm down once Market started, but they haven't. The high level stress of launching a new company on October 16th is gone, but that's about it.

I worked my butt off. It felt like the old days when I worked 100 hour weeks at Oly. And I did everything I needed to plus a little more. And I felt really good about the job I did.

What do I do? I work for a furniture designer, Julian Chichester, in their US office (Julian lives in London) and am over the sales and marketing but I also do a lot of the operations. The office is in High Point, NC and I work from home and travel...a lot.

In launching this new company we had about 150 new products that were arriving a week before Market. A WEEK. Which, let me tell you, is not enough time. We set up a photography booth in our warehouse and as each container arrived, they would unload it, unpack it, measure it and photograph it.

I had to create skus, descriptions, and all the other information for importing into our system. I had to set up this complicated scanning system to take orders at the show. I had to create all the marketing including ads, postcards, email blasts, price lists, tear sheets, website, price tags, terms & conditions, business cards, catalogs, order forms. I had to keep track of deadlines, maintain the mailing list, work with my graphics designer, photoshop guru, office staff, photographer and customers.

And did I mention that I had to do this for our existing company, Julian Chichester, as well? Oh, and I have a newborn baby who was born prematurely and was in the NICU for 25 days during all of this.

I didn't sleep much. In fact, I slept very little at all - 2 or 3 hours a night. I neglected and ignored everything. I didn't have time for personal email or calls and have about 50 emails and calls to return. I didn't have time to exercise. Tony took care of all household chores (which he usually does anyway) and fed me. I even neglected Tony and Ryan. I would nurse Ryan on a pillow on my lap while I worked on my laptop - the above photo is my boy on my lap. He would sleep on that same pillow. I would glance at him and kiss him once in awhile cause he's just so darn cute, but I was definitely focused on other things.

But I really do love my job. And I do love my company - both of them. And we were a huge success. It wasn't all perfect, but I am very happy with the job I did - especially in such a short amount of time.

I believe I am done venting. If any of you are still reading, thank you. And for those of you who have called or emailed, my goal is to return those calls and emails....soon.

this is why I've been absent lately...

My company is launching a new company called "MR BROWN" and our company launch is this Saturday at the High Point Furniture Market.

But I have to say, modern technology is amazing. It has made it possible for me to work at home. I have a photographer in High Point photographing the images. They upload them onto our server. I have someone send the high res images from NC to my photoshop guy in CA and he emails the images back to me so I can do all the marketing.

Amazing.

What will be more amazing is if I finish it all. It should have been sent to the printer last week, but we have yet to receive TWO containers and an air shipment of products.

But I have to say, I really do love my job. I'm creating all the marketing materials and the majority of the operational functions. And, although I'm embarrassed and disappointed in myself, I've outsourced the website programming and it is amazing. The program basically allows me to go in and load and edit all of the content which has been really fun.

I'm hoping the website will be up and running by Saturday - for now, I'm still testing and loading content, but the website address is www.mrbrownhome.com. And my other website is www.julianchichester.com.

See? Although it is much more boring, I can write about something other than Ryan.

right up to the moon and back

When Ryan was in the NICU I think I cried every single day. I cried when I would see him looking like this...wouldn't you? I cried when they would stick a needle in him. I cried when he struggled with the tubes in his nose or mouth. Most of all, I cried when I had to say good-bye at the end of the day and leave him in the hospital.

And I don't think I've cried since the day we brought him home...until yesterday. I read books to Ryan once in a while even though he usually sleeps through them. Yesterday I read "Guess How Much I Love You" which has always been one of my favorite books. In fact, I gave this to Tony when we were dating. If you're a mom - or even if you're not - I'm sure you know this book.

But if by chance you've never read it, you should. Yesterday I did and I cried. I was so overwhelmed with gratitude for this little baby. That he is in our lives and that he is healthy. I really didn't think I would be a mom so this feels like the biggest bonus blessing.

So yes, I cried when I read to my Little Nutbrown Hair whom I love to right up to the moon and back.

crazy days...crazy faces

I don't imagine I'll have much time to blog for the next 30 days or so. My company is launching a new company on October 17th and I have a to-do list that is stressing me out. But for now, here are a few pictures of our funny boy. Do all babies continually make funny faces?

And here's what's going on in the Smart house...

I had my third bout of my mystery illness since Ryan's birth. For some reason I get this weird illness that happens. My body starts aching, I get either a fever and/or the chills. Sometimes I get a bad headache. I go to bed for the night and either shiver or sweat and 15 to 20 hours later it's gone. My doctor doesn't know what it is....do any of you?

Ryan isn't sleeping very well. For the first several weeks he slept like a champ. But the last several nights he's been waking up every hour. Tony's been a champ and gets up to tend to Ryan and he usually ends up sleeping on the sofa with Ryan on his chest...which we're not sure is a good thing.

My work is crazy. Crazy. And it will be like this for several more weeks. We're trying to decide whether to fly back with Ryan to North Carolina for the big furniture market where we're launching our new company.

And one of these days I intend to write about something other than Ryan or being a mom. One of these days...

But with a baby as cute as this, what else is there to write about??

September 17th...

I've been mulling over what to write about on this day - September 17th - the day I've been focusing on since January - the day our baby was due to be born.

It's either the lack of sleep, the lack of time or the lack of creativity, but I got nothing. So I'm just going to type and see what appears in this posting....

After 6.5 weeks of mothering little Ryan, I am in sore need of a Parenting 101 class.

For the past week or so, we've been fretting over an infection Ryan had after his circumcision. As a result of the antibiotics he was on, the poor little guy has zero flora in his tummy and has been pooping about every 5 minutes or so. So you can imagine how sore his cute little bum has been. I've seen diaper rash on other babies before, but somehow it is SO much worse when it is your own little baby. Without going into a lot of detail, he has raw, open sores that, if his screams are any indication, are extremely painful.

We've been washing his little bum in the sink for over a week now. After the first few days of doing this, I called my sister to discuss the situation.

My sister: What diaper rash ointment are you using?
Me: Uh, the one you gave me.
My sister: Have you tried any others?
Me: There are others?

duh. Of course there has to be others. I would have hit myself on the head if my hands weren't soiled with baby poop.

My sister was at my house in less than 15 minutes with 3 other kinds of diaper rash ointment. And she said: You should call your doctor to see what they recommend.

Me: I can just call my doctor and ask for a diaper rash ointment recommendation?

So call I did. And our pediatrician (Dr. Kathleen Omara whom I already love as much as Dr. Markus and Dr. Baker) said to get Triple Paste. And they have it at Smiths!

Triple Paste is magic. It worked like a charm and Ryan's little open sores are now healing. He's off his antibiotics and we hope he'll be pooping a bit less very soon.

In 6.5 weeks of his life, he's conquered his 4th infection, his horrible diaper rash, learned to eat as a preemie, graduated from the NICU....and most of all, taught his mommy and daddy how much they LOVE having a baby to care for.

make over

Today marks 6 weeks since Ryan was born. It's a magical date in terms of my recovery from the C-Section.

At 6 weeks I can exercise - which I did this morning! I took it easy and did 20 light minutes on the eliptical machine, but it was enough to break a sweat. I'm declaring today the first day of my post-partum makeover.

Along with my impressive 20 minute workout (yes, you read sarcasm in that), I chopped off my hair. It wasn't quite enough to donate to Locks of Love, but it was close. I just couldn't wait a minute longer. In fact, I resisted the urge to shave my head. But I do have bangs again. And, if I do say so myself, they are rather cute. The best part about my new haircut is I just put gel in it and let it dry and it looked passable for presentable - which is exactly the look I'm going for.

At 6 weeks I can take a bath - which I plan on doing tonight. Between breast feeding and carrying Ryan around, I believe I am developing a bit of a hunch back. I think I'm going to splurge and get a massage too.

At 6 weeks I can vacuum! (I've never known how to spell that word) This has been driving me crazy. Whenever someone asks what they can do for me, I ask them to vacuum. My mom thinks I need to wait another 2 weeks, but I'm going to sneak it in and see how it goes. What's the big deal with vacuuming (that spelling really can't be right) anyway?

And at 6 weeks, I feel like I'm getting this baby thing. Ryan is still adorable, but dang, he takes a lot of time. I've been working full-time for a few weeks now and feel like I'm getting a system of feeding, laundry, cleaning down.

Here's to another 6 weeks!

enjoy

When I was pregnant, people were always telling me to "enjoy being pregnant." I totally didn't get that. How do you enjoy nausea or throwing up everyday? How do you enjoy swollen feet, insomnia and heartbearn? Not that I'm complaining. I'm really not. But really, how do you enjoy all of that?

I did enjoy feeling little Ryan move inside me. I remember certain movements that seemed really weird to me. Like shaking. I told Tony that I thought our baby was having seizures inside of me. When Ryan was in the NICU, I would spend hours - HOURS - just holding him. He would wiggle and squirm in my arms.

And I would recognize those movements in my arms as very same movements in my tummy just a few weeks ago.

Now that we have Ryan at home, people are once again telling me to "enjoy him", to "enjoy having a newborn", to "enjoy being a mom."

Now THAT, I get.